☂Health Class

No I am not going to talk about some disgusting teacher's views on sex. Today in health class we were talking about characteristics of ourselves. How people see us, how we see them, how we see ourselves, and how we want to be seen. It really got me thinking about how, how I see myself is so very much different then how other people see me, and how that is so much different from how I want to be seen. I am very loud around people. I always say what I'm thinking and I am sometimes (maybe more than sometimes) am very, ummm... suggestive, not in the way i dress, but in the way i act and what I say. I am also funny and loud and not afraid of anything (except spiders!). I am pretty much care free. But on the inside (when i'm not around people) I am very quiet and shy(not really really shy, but more afraid of people hating me because of what I think). Because of my suggestive actions people think that I will be the first to entertain that certian Health Topic. That is not me. I am so afraid of being that girl who gets pregnant before she can get a good education that I don't even try to get boys to even like me. If they do then that's great, but I'm too young and too busy to have more worries on my mind. I am horrible at meeting new people because I never remember their name and I have to ask them 50 thousand times. I feel bad for the things I say to people sometimes. And I am most definately not care free. I have to worry about lots of things: if my father will ever call, if my sisters and brother still know that I love them (they live with my father and my step mother,evil if u will, tells them that I don't love them), marks on my report card, university, who I can trust, and who i can't, and finally what do I want to do with my life, and who do I want to become? Don't be mistaken I don't hate myself. I just don't like some of the tings I do or say. I am totally different from what people see me as. And I hate that.

yours,

a dancer.